my intro - blech

[tsukikage]

How would you like to become a god? According to Mormon theology, all humans are capable of becoming gods – it is part of our divine heritage as children of God, also known as Heavenly Father. In fact, they believe God was once human, like us. So what is Mormonism? Mormonism is a nickname for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (or the LDS Church), which is a Christian denomination that believes in religious texts in addition to the New and Old Testaments, and in revelations from God in all ages. These supposed additional sources of religious knowledge lead to practices and beliefs not held by traditional Christian denominations, but there are large differences even between the theologies of non-Mormon denominations. In addition, there are Christians who believe that there were books that were kept out of the traditional bible, albeit by different means than the Book of Mormon is said to have been kept out of the bible. Above all, the LDS Church proclaims Jesus as the savior of humanity, which is the number one belief that makes a denomination Christian.

I'm gonna submit this and make some ramen now.

Comments

[tiwonge.livejournal.com]

Is that the totality of your piece on Mormonism?

Is it too late too offer suggestions?

[tsukikage85.livejournal.com]

Definitely not too late.
But no, that's just the introduction. The full thing is going to be 750 words.

[tiwonge.livejournal.com]

I would probably focus more on what Mormonism is, rather than what it isn't.

How does it view Christ? Talk about the plan of salvation, maybe, and Christ's role in that. And then mention that after the death and resurrection, Jesus went to minister to "other sheep," the people of the Americas that Mormons believe descended from Israelites. Mention that a record of this is contained in the Book of Mormon, revealed to and translated by Joseph Smith, who re-instituted what he believed to be the original church.

I wouldn't talk about how it was "kept out" of the Bible. It was "kept out" of the Bible in much the same way that the Principia Mathematica or the Upanishads were kept out--the people who compiled the Bible had no knowledge of its existance, even if it had been written. (Which, I believe, it hadn't been. I don't know the timeline, but I believe the BoM is said to be a distillation, by Mormon, of earlier writings around what, 300 AD? 600 AD? I don't know the date.)

Especially if this is the introduction, just introduce some basic points. This isn't really the place for comparisons and contrasts, although you will probably want to do that at some point.

[tiwonge.livejournal.com]

The first sentence is OK. But after the question What is Mormonism?

You can answer that by refering to the name Mormon itself. Mormonism is a name for the LDS CHurch, that believes that Jesus visited the New World to minister to the "lost sheep." Talk about how these people wrote about their history and his visit, and these were distilled by Mormon, who gives his name to the Book of Mormon. This was revealed to and translated by Joseph Smith and so on.

I wouldn't say "supposed additional sources" because they clearly are sources in addition to the Bible--no supposition is needed for that. They suppose to represent an accurate account of indiginous people of the New World.

Other extracanonical books really are irrelevent to the LDS. No need to mention those other Christians who believe that other books are kept out.

I also wouldn't claim the status of Mormonism as Christian in the opening paragraph. You're giving a conclusion there without giving a hint that there is an argument. You might introduce the argument by saying that some Christians deny that Mormons are Christians, but don't claim the argument finished in the introduction.

[tsukikage85.livejournal.com]

I'm going to re-read your comments later, but regarding mentioning extracanonical books... I guess I chose to mention that because one reason some Christians believe that Mormons aren't is because they believe in books other than those that are in the bible. I realize that there's a big difference between the two situations, but I suppose to some extent I'm reaching for arguments here, and that's one of the few I could think of. (I can't write a 750 word paper just saying "Mormons believe that Christ is the savior" over and over.)
You still make a good point, though, so I'm gonna work on figuring out how to re-phrase what I wrote.

Also, about the "supposed additional sources" bit... The reason I say supposed is because of the knowledge part. I'm writing this for a non-Mormon audience who doesn't believe that much of what the BoM says is true (and I'm not trying to argue that it is), thus it's a supposed source of knowledge.

[tiwonge.livejournal.com]

It's the knowledge that's supposed, not the sources. Additional sources of supposed religious knowledge would be a little clearer.

Or just re-word it. But the way it's written, you suppose the source, not the knowledge.

[tsukikage85.livejournal.com]

Okay, that's a lot clearer, you're right. Thank you. ^_^

[stiffie.livejournal.com]

I like you. :)

[tsukikage85.livejournal.com]

LOL! What's that about?

[rockerchick-205.livejournal.com]

[tsukikage85.livejournal.com]

Heh... Well, that's just a little bit of what it's about, but I suppose if you're more interested in why the theology is different than the theology itself, what I wrote suffices.

[jupistrahan.livejournal.com]

MOrmonism isn't as strange as people think it is, but it's still very different from other Christian religions. I can't wait to read what else she writes. I think unbiased essays on things like religions are just terribly interesting.

[jupistrahan.livejournal.com]

Ooh, I'm loving this so far.

Personal preference suggestions: Avoid doing anything besides skimming over the Joseph Smith thing. That's always a tough pill to swallow from any POV besides the "I was raised Mormon" kind of way.

I can't wait to see the rest! (feel free to go beyond the 750 word limit!)

Also, let me know if you have any questions about the religion you want answers. Except for the freaky difficult questions that no one but Elders know the answers to, I know the LDS church like the back of my hand. =D I was the good student in Sunday School.

[tsukikage85.livejournal.com]

Thanks - I just may ask you for some help/advice.
But damn do I hate this class. And writing in general. But that's because I suck at writing, which I guess is why I'm taking the class, isn't it? It's a vicious cycle...