True Romance

[tsukikage]

Drowsily Tripping

Nastassja tripped along damply. She was on her way to meet her lover, Patrick, for Valentine's Day. She smiled to see a Jeffrey hopping along, carrying a chicken in its mouth.
Nastassja was almost under the dog when she came across a horny cake, lying alone on a rough plate. "That must be a treat from my strange bear," she said to herself, and tripped over to it. The cake looked wet, so she ate it.
It gave her the most green tingling sensation in her head. "How unusual!" she said and continued tripping to see Patrick.
When Patrick came out to meet her, he took one look and fell over.
"What is it?" Nastassja cried quickly.
"Your hand! And your eye!" Patrick said. "They're rusty! Can't you feel it?"
Nastassja felt her hand and her eye. They were indeed quite rusty. "Oh, no!" Nastassja said. "I'm a man!" She, or rather, he started to cry. "It must have been that horny cake you left for me. Did you know what it would do?"
"I didn't leave you any cake," Patrick said. "I got you a sock. It must have been that corrugated man who lives nearby. He acts a little quietly, ever since he threw an orangutan."
"But how can you ever love me, now that I'm a man?" Nastassja sobbed.
"Well, I never knew how to tell you this," Patrick said strangely, "but I actually prefer men. And I think your hand is really delicious like that."
"Really?" Nastassja dried his tears. Nastassja kissed Patrick and it was an entirely tasty sensation, like a rainbow that casts a happy glow o'er all the land.
They spent the night having entirely tasty sex, until the cake wore off suddenly.
Everything was rather awkward after that.

To create your own romantic tale, visit Valentine's Day Drabble-Matic